THE BIG RETORT

Concerns for Amy Winehouse and other “rehab celebs” brings to mind the Priory Hospital and NHS treatment for stars. I was first tipped off about the junkie-star-scam a number of years ago. All hush hush of course...  It was a passing comment that held my interest. The Priory Hospital, where the former 'vet' held a senior position,  apparently regularly played host to ' stars whose treatment was subsidised wholly or in part by the NHS' . Stars on Soash..? No. No. No.  

TheBigRetort uncovers the real reason behind the 'disputes' involving tube and transport workers - and it makes 'sober' reading to passengers. Travelling home on the North London Line (overground) one evening, I happened to fall into conversation with a fellow traveller who was party to a secret... a dope secret. He had been watching a televised football match at a pub. Arsenal -v- Letsgetsmashed. Notably with TfL tube staff (members of the RMT Union) fans in drunken attendance. His 'best mate' worked on the Tube and had done so for many years.... My fellow traveller warned his friend about his and other tube workers' drinking and drug taking. His mate, who had work the next day, chuckled... then revealed their strategy for cheating - call it what it is - the transport management's 'drink and dope test safety measures'. He told TheBigRetort that many London Transport employees who got 'smashed' at these televised drink-an-drug fests then...

Kent Police have made an arrest following its investigation into the murder of DR Victoria Anyetei, 53. Anyetei, a devout Christian, worked as a locum consultant paediatrician at St Thomas’ Hospital, London. Her body was discovered by her 19-year-old son in her silver Toyota Avensis in Dartford, Kent, at 10.20am on the 14th August.

Up! Up! And away!! A piece of legal history written on planet Earth may set a precedent about the copyright ownership of a dead author's work. Superboy was a “joint work” between Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster. However, fast forward to a world dominated by the dastardly legal profession. A chunk of rock has recently been thrown at the Man in Tights, not in the form of deadly Kryptonite... but the American copyright code; itself influenced by European copyright law... and there’s a first. In 1948, in a previous suit between Jerry Siegel and DC (then called “Detective Comics Inc.”) it was found that Superboy was “separate and distinct” from Superman. Siegel was found to be its “sole originator.” The case was settled with DC paying the authors for the “sole and exclusive” rights. Many believe the pair, who died in some poverty it is said, were ripped off. However, following the authors' deaths, a 1976 revision to the copyright laws allowed the Siegel family in 2002 to give a notice ...

By combining a microperforated rubber sole and a breathable waterproof membrane, the Geox system lets perforation go out through the sole keeping feet dry and healthy. At least that's what a certain shoe manufacturer claims. So why whenever it rains does this poor 'soul' feel water seeping into his socks? GEOX SUCKS WATER IN AND MINGLES WITH SWEAT.

In an extraordinary exclusive interview, TheBigRetort speaks to a Pentagon whistelblower who claims a message from outer space is not benign. Clarence Dacre, former staff officer at the Pentagon, claimed 'first contact’ with an extra-terrestrial civilisation has already happened – it took place thirty years ago. Apparently it began when a strong, narrow band radio signal was inadvertently picked up by an early SETI researcher. He circled the discovery on the computer printout and wrote " Wow !" alongside. The comment stuck ever since. But the signal, said to have lasted for a total of 72 seconds, which bore all the expected hallmarks of potential extraterrestrial contact, remained a one-off, a 'possibility' never repeated. Or so it seemed... because the human race may be about to go the way of the dinosaur. Alerted to Mr Dacre’s claims by a correspondent in North Carolina, we were forced to make contact via a combination of email and phone number relays. We encoun...

American scamBusters Audri, Jim and Pete bring alarming news from across the Pond that should prove a dire warning for homeowners strapped for cash in dear old Blighty... Apparently, low interest rates and soaring house prices have encouraged "predatory practices” in America – resulting in the theft of houses, literally. The con artists use three basic schemes to steal a victim’s home, or as much of the equity in it as possible. There are many variations, but here’s the basic three: 1) "Equity Stripping" or "Bailout". The scammer "rescues" the victim by getting them to surrender the title deeds, promising that s/he can rent and buy back the house later. But the scammer simply bleeds the property of most (or all of) the equity and the homeowner usually loses the house. 2) Phantom Help. The supposed “rescuer” charges very high fees for basic phone calls and paperwork that the homeowner could have done himself. Often, the scammer promises to represent th...

Figures revealing the ‘largest monthly fall in asking prices' since the survey began claim to reveal that London 'fell' by an earth-shattering 2.5%. An earth-shattering two-point-five. But don't worry too much... as TheBigRetort reveals, the so-called experts have got it wrong - again. (Caveat follows: For now at least.) Relatively few new instructions took place during the time that the figures cover; August is a month for holidays not usually given to slogging under the eaves. To be sure the Rightmove report acknowledges this – but then ignores it. So why is Rightmove using its data to shoot at the HIP? Apparently rightmove isn't alone in singling out the introduction of HIPs as a major contributory factor… “The drastic fall of 41% in new instructions for detached houses illustrates the impact of HIPs,” one expert reports. But is this the case? Such statements, given the admission that these figures cover the holiday season, seem suspect. Detached houses are not k...

Has Cheltenham & Gloucester found a way to beat the liquidity squeeze? C&G is Lloyds TSB Group’s specialist residential mortgage provider. In August 2007 it wrote to borrowers informing them on “Important information about C&G mortgages”. The mortgage lender warned: “Cheltenham & Gloucester plc, as you may know, has been part of the Lloyds TSB Group since 1995. What we’re planning to do is change who the ‘lender’ is for your mortgage. Today it is Cheltenham & Gloucester plc. From 1 October, it will be Lloyds TSB Bank plc.” So what does the lender have to say about its new now-it's-with-us-now-it-aint mortgage ? “This change has been prompted by new international banking regulations which come in on (sic) 1 January 2008 (called the Basil II Accord).” But has the lender been adding a little too-much Basel to the sub-prime lending stew in order to hide its US stake? "Basel II is an effort by international banking supervisors to update the original internati...

Attending a wedding at St Paul's Cathedral I saw a familiar face treading behind the newlyweds. It was only after we exchanged pleasant 'nods' and 'hellos' that I realised I knew her... and yet we had never met. It was former Prime Minister now Baroness Thatcher. 'Thatcher!' one of my friends screamed when they heard of the encounter. Don't know why people do that. You just need to mention her name and they scream, Thatcher! (Well the people I usually hang round with do.) However it was our encounter later at the reception that has since been written into the history books. It began following a failed attempt to speak to another wedding guest who was having none of it. Pleasantries with me that is. Whether it was my attire - casual - or the video camera I had used outside the church (Sony), or me in general - George Michael chin - I don't know. Probably a mix of all of these things and more. It is true to say that this 'knight' did not like t...

Congestion charge... Penalty charge... Bus Lane contravention... you can see where this is leading. TheBigRetort exposes a scandal which threatens to drive a coach-and-horse-shit through City Hall - and with it Ken Livingstone's orifice. The thorn in the Mayor's side? A 'money box junction' situated at Lewisham Way/Parkfield Road, recently nominated as one of England's busiest and noisiest interchanges. It may seem strange to ask but ask I shall - weren't yellow box junctions designed to increase traffic flow - as Transport for London claims - or are they simply money-raking, tax-gathering, toll gates, the ME stand YOU deliver of 21st Century government? And whilst we are on that particular rant... will mayoral candidate that toff from Henley on Thames get the votes with moving traffic contraventions as his 'ticket'? (He's not an old fogey, he's a yogey; a young fogey.) Or will that right-leaning ego-driven shock jock from London's Biggest O...